Monday, June 24, 2013

One more year until my life begins...

There are so many issues in this world that are far worse than mine: poverty, starvation, homelessness... However, my problems are still problems & need to be addressed right here & now for my own sanity. I have one year until I graduate college. ONE. That means one year until I start my life on my own. Not that my parents are kicking me out; It’s quite the opposite actually. Nevertheless, I’ve been dying to get out on my own in the world & support myself. I just don’t know what I want to do with such newfound freedom & responsibility.


 Here’s my most recent Facebook status that may clear up (or confuse) what I am trying to say: “So many options to choose from & only 1 year to decide. What the heck am I going to do with my life!? Live in Warwick/get my masters while working at West Point, teach English in India, work in NYC/live in Queens with Dad, live in Italy with Mom & get my masters? Can someone just assign me an awesome job that has lots of vacay time to travel, make loads of $, & involves my major? K, thanks.” As you may have gathered, I am conflicted with staying close to home (Warwick), the place that has sent me off the grid (emotionally) & grounded me all at the same time, or elsewhere where I may not feel as connected but may have a better chance at a career. I am also conflicted because money in my family is very important because we work hard for it. Nevertheless, I am not striving to be filthy rich. I want to be surrounded by people that I enjoy being around, eat good food, & travel as much as I can. As long as I have those 3 things fulfilled, I’ll be happy. & maybe a puppy too. I love puppies. On top of all this confusion, I have one problem that is at the forefront of all of my problems-my relationship. Am I stable enough to be in a relationship right now? How can I let Sam go when he is the best person I have ever met in my entire life? Morals, ideals, beliefs, & my future are completely scrambled, but I am now realizing that this blogging thing is a great way to figure this stuff out (even if no one reads it). Thanks, Blogger/Google+, for saving the day. =)

Until next time... ciao 💗

Follow me on Instagram: @arielview13

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Reverse Culture Shock

I had a hunch that coming back to NY would be different than when I left. Not that anything had physically changed, but I certainly had. It wasn't the same city that I remembered or that I had fantasized about coming back to & it made me want to turn around & go back to Europe. My mom is in Italy, my home in Warwick, NY where I grew up is rented out, & many of my close friends remain upstate while I'm in Queens. Along with the empty feeling of not having friends in Queens, I also feel an emptiness of not having Sam around after our falling out. So many questions run through my head of whether or not being together is the right thing. It is so difficult to determine where we stand being 5 hours apart from each other. But for right now, the best thing for me is to stay busy, travel to stay with my friends in Warwick, & I joined the gym at Lucille Roberts. While in Europe, it felt like I lived there, but when I returned back to NY, I realized it was just one long vacation. I landed at JFK exhausted & jet-lagged, & all of the bullshit hit me at once: Relationship problems, Pace University admin already screwing up everything... I really don't want to deal with it right now. People keep telling me to take things one step at a time, but I can't stop myself from thinking ahead. What the heck am I going to do 1 year from now when I graduate college? Should I go right into getting an MBA or start working? Should I live with my mom in Europe or will I still be with Sam & want to stay here with him? Everything is up in the air & completely confusing & the only thing I can say right now is that I am finally 21. So who cares about any of this stuff right now? I can't think about it all because there are no answers right now so why overthink it or think about it all? Going out with my friends seems to be the best solution to my problems & only time will tell where everything & everyone in my life stands.

Until next time... ciao 💗

Follow me on Instagram: @arielview13

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Interracial relationships are still an issue?

Has anyone seen the new Cheerios commercial with the white mother, black father, & the adorable daughter? If not, here is the link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pbWeH9cztHw. It is amazing to me that this commercial caused controversy for I thought people would be used to our global culture by now. When I saw this commercial, I immediately thought of a strong family, one that loves & cares for each other. However, many viewers complained that this commercial made them sick & was offended that Cheerios supported the production of an inferior race. Well, I would like to say that children with more than one race are amazing & just as smart or sometimes more intelligent than other children. I am 1/2 Indian & 1/2 American (my American side goes back to the 1700s & prior to that goes back to Europe [English, French, Irish]). For those who have a problem with this commercial, grow up & take your head out of the ignorant hole you live in. It is the 21st century people! Why are we still dealing with this??????????

Until next time... ciao 💗

Follow me on Instagram: @arielview13